


Joke's on you

by DreadfulShieldmaiden



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) (2020), DC Extended Universe, Joker (2019), Suicide Squad (2016)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-26
Updated: 2020-05-16
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:34:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 8,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22915582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DreadfulShieldmaiden/pseuds/DreadfulShieldmaiden
Summary: What if Arthur lived on Harley's timeline, and he was not the Joker, but just a guy who became a neighbor to a crazy female criminal. As their relationship grows, it requires sacrifices and descoveries about themselves, while Arthur is slowly becoming a target for Harley's enemies, as for example, the Black Mask and the Scarecrow. Will they manage to live on their feelings and let it blossom with all the danger surrounding them?
Relationships: Arthur Fleck & Harleen Quinzel, Arthur Fleck/Harleen Quinzel, Arthur Fleck/Harley Quinn, Arthur Fleck/Original Female Character(s), Arthur Fleck/You, Joker (DCU)/Harleen Quinzel, Joker x Harley Quinn, Joker/Harley, Joker/Harley Quinn
Comments: 15
Kudos: 67





	1. Lotus flower

**Author's Note:**

> What if Arthur lived on Harley's timeline (all the works I've read imagined her into his timeline, so I wanted to do the opposite) and he was not the Joker, but just a guy who became a neighbor to a crazy female criminal. Also, there is not a plot yet, it may become a more consistent work, but the original idea is to write freeform chapters and to focus on these small, daily interactions amongst Harley and Arthur (and Bruce). Other folks may come in, there'll be plenty of mentions, but I'll be focusing more on the two of them at first and using things from Philipps' Joker (2019) and Yang's Birds of Prey (2020), but probably changing things from the movies too.

Arthur had moved to this new neighborhood and he actually liked it. After the death of his mother, Penny, he wanted to move away from his old life and start something fresh and new, a life he could call his own.

But as his two jobs as street artist and hospital clown didn’t pay that much, it wasn’t easy to find a new place. Then, one of these days wandering through the streets of the city on his daily work dressed as a clown, he found this rental ad over a Taiwanese restaurant.

“Yeah, I have another small apartment upstairs, I can still rent” the elder man called Doc said “The other one is rented for a very nice girl, lotus flower.”

“Her name is Lotus Flower?” Arthur asked, amused.

“No, it’s not. I can’t tell her name. You probably will not see her around very much.” Doc said, smiling. Arthur knew the city enough to read the message _Forget I talked about her_ all over the old man’s smile.

Then, Doc took him to know the place. It was smaller than the place he shared with Penny, but it would do for now.

“I’m taking it.” Arthur said, shaking hands with the man to seal the deal.

Arthur finished bringing his things over to the new place during the weekend. He spent some days sleeping there and he had never managed to take a look on the girl next door that Doc commented on. He heard some noises, mainly TV noises, but that was all.

_I think he was right_ , Arthur thought, _She must be a shy person_.

He finished bringing his things and organizing the space. He felt good. It bothered him that his mother’s death bought him a weird kind of peace. He was also happy that he was getting all the medicines he needed, which was not a routine due to the instability of Gotham’s public services. He told his social assistant that he was feeling fine and she congratulated him.

“HEY! You must be the new guy around!!!” Arthur met the ‘lotus flower’ girl on a lazy Sunday morning, she seemed to be back from grocery shopping, as Arthur witnessed her coming up stairs full of bags, back to the apartment in front of his.

“Yes, I am. Nice to meet you, flower girl. Do you want some help?” He asked, when he saw she had plenty of bags with her.

“Yeah, I could use some strong man help”, she said giggling. Arthur noticed her features then. She had a high pitched voice and a very funny appearance. She kind of looked like a clown, with her blonde hair colored at the end of her small ponytails, her shiny clothes and the tattoos all over her body and her face.

“I’m not a strong man, but I can help” he said. He took some of her bags and waited while she opened the door.

Her apartment was the extreme opposite of his. His space was impersonal and mostly grey, with the few house furniture scattered all over the place. Hers was very messy, full of colors, mainly pink, blue and brown, with lots of furniture – some nonsense ones, even – all over the space. There was also a lot of information over the walls.

“You can put it over the table, thanks!” she said, smiling. “You know, I have a friend living with me, my hyena, Brucey, please don’t get near him. He is not very fond of strangers.” She said, smiling. Arthur settled all her grocery bags over the table, then noticing the big hyena chained to the wall.

“You have a fucking hyena!” he said, astonished.

“Yeah, man, I do”, she said, giving him a deliciously expressive smile “Other folks have cats or dogs. I have a _fucking_ hyena.”

Arthur looked to the brown furred beast, which faced him back, snarling.

“Brucey boy is a nice guy, believe me. The best friend a girl could ask.” She said “By the way, what’s your name?”

“My name is Arthur Fleck. I’m a street artist.”

“Hey, how nice! I’m Harleen. I’m…” She hesitated a moment, rolling her eyes over the walls “I’m currently unemployed and kind of freelancing in… _Several_ areas. But I’ve got a PhD, I’m a psychiatrist.”

“Wow, that’s great. Why don’t you work with it?”

“That’s a long story, Arthur, believe me”, she said, smiling.

He turned around and he saw a man’s face drawing full of knives on the opposite wall.

“Bad break up, huh?” he said.

“The worst one! Mr. J is a dick!” she said and then she put her hand over her mouth like a child that was caught saying improper words by an adult.

“You’re probably way better without him, Harleen.” He noticed she didn’t tell him her last name.

“Yes, I am.” Then Bruce snarled loudly. “Hey, it’s time to feed Brucey boy”.

Arthur got a little bit unsettled by the idea of seeing a hyena eating in the apartment of a complete strange and thought he better be going.

“I gotta go. I will rehearsal my acting for the week.” He said “Nice to meet you.”, he moved towards the door, followed by the girl.

“Thanks for your help, Artie Boy!” she said “Can I call you like that, right?”, she opened the door and before he answered, she hugged him warmly and intensely. “See you around!”

Then, she closed the door.

Arthur stood several minutes on her door enjoying the ghost feeling of her body pressed to his.

He had liked this lotus flower girl very much. 


	2. Flower girl

He did not hear from Harley for a while.

He wanted to ask Doc more things about her. She was somehow familiar, but Arthur had problems remembering where he knew people. He always came close to asking about her to the old Taiwanese man, but he remembered their first interaction and he thought that Doc would either not tell him the truth or not answering at all.

_Who are you¸Harleen?_ He asked himself. He thought about asking about her for the people he worked with, but they were such morons and he was afraid he could get her on trouble.

Instead of asking her, Arthur decided he would check Harleen around any of these days and that he would follow her around to know who was the lotus flower girl that had got her way into his thoughts.


	3. Terrible person

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They meet again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so excited with this ship, Goddess help me.

The next time he heard of her was not exactly pleasant.

Arthur woke up on a Saturday morning listening to someone throwing up on his door. He wasn’t new to this, since he was used to wake up at his old building with his drunk neighbors throwing up and fighting all over the place.

When he opened the door, ready to ask to leave any probable street indigent who passed unnoticed by Doc , he was caught by surprise when he saw Harleen. She had thrown up on his cheap carpet and she was laying by the side of the puddle of vomit.

_That was a hell of a night_ , _right?,_ Arthur thought seeing her shiny and dark make up and her black suit that made him think of 80s rock singers.

“Hey, Harleen, long time no see?”

“Artie?” she called him “Is it all right…” she coughed, some vomit coming for her mouth “If I sleep here for a while?”

Arthur did not plan to spend his weekend morning taking care of a drunk person, but he saw she had not conditions to do anything by herself.

“Bad break up, huh?” Arthur asked, bending down to lift her up and bring her into his apartment.

After cleaning up the mess that Harley did on his door – he had to throw his carpet away –, he took some toilet paper and cleaned her. He arranged some of Penny’s old bed sheets and put over his bed so she could lay down on it.

Harleen was half-wake and half-sleeping and kept babbling non sense things to him during the process.

“You shouldn’t take care of me, Arthur” she said, it was the first meaningful sentence she managed to speak since he rescued her from his threshold “I think I’m a terrible person.”

He giggled a little.

“You’re just a good person in a terrible state” he answered her, but she was already asleep.


	4. Puppy eyes and clowns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Small talk about puppy eyes and clowns.

Harleen had been avoiding Arthur since the vomit episode.

He was so kind to her and she behaved like a teenager party hard girl, throwing up all over his stuff. When she woke up on his apartment, he wasn’t there, but luckily for her the door was left open and she just wrote a note “THX, Artie Boy! See ya around, Harls.”, left it over his dinner table and went back to her own home to find a hungry and angry Bruce waiting for her.

Whenever she listened to Arthur nearby, she quickly find a spot to hide or swept away subtly so she did not need to face him.

Until, one day he knocked on the door and she answered inadvertently because she was waiting for the pizza guy to delivery her favorite junkie food on the world (altogether with Sal’s egg sandwich, of course).

“Hey, Harleen. I’m out of milk, do you have some? I can buy you more later to repay you”, Arthur said, with his kind voice and his puppy deep green-blue eyes that made Harley’s knees tremble a little.

She was out of words for a second and drown in a wave of shame, but quickly recovered.

“Of course, I do, Artie.” She said, smiling plainly to him “You know I’m a grown up girl. Woman, I mean” She giggled. “I’m not like, you know, these party hard teenagers who can’t keep their shit together.”

“Oh, about that day, it was okay. You just slept. It wasn’t a problem” Arthur said, reassuring her with his kindness.

“Come on in, Artie, I’ll get ya some milk” she said.

He got inside her home and she delivered him a bottle of milk.

“I used to take care of my mom, before she died recently. I’m used to taking care of people. Don’t worry about that day, Harley” he said.

“I know you’re a good fella, Artie, I can see it written on your puppy eyes” _maybe they’re too puppyish for your own good sake, dear,_ she thought. “But I’m an adult. Maybe not a normal adult, but still. I have to keep my shit together. It's not your fault Mr. J being an asshole.”

“It’s not yours, either”, Arthur replied, calmly.

“What?”

“I mean, it’s not your fault he was an abusive person. My mother was an abusive person. I used to think that it was all my fault, everything I suffered with her. It wasn’t. It was her fault”

She starred blankly at him, it was the first time someone seemed to actually care about the way she felt since she left Mr. J.

“ I know you’re a doctor in psychiatry, but still, sometimes these obvious things are not so obvious for ourselves. And don’t care about losing your shit like that. We live in a world where guys like that playboy Bruce Wayne and that gangster Roman Sionis rule this goddamn forsaken city. We _have to_ lose our shit sometimes.”. 

A single tear ran down Harley’s cheek.

“And there’s a giant bat…” she said, faintly, trying to be humorous.

He laughed.

“There’s that too.” He said.

“You know, Arthie, let’s have pizza and chat sometime”, Harley asked him, smiling.

“That sounds dope, Harleen.” He said “Dope is the word the young folks use nowadays, right?”

“It is”, she laughed.

“Let me finish my cereal, later on I’ve to go clowning the streets.”

“I don’t like clowns. They make me think of Mister J, Arthie.” Harley told him “But I want to believe you’re one of the good clowns.”

“I try to be” Arthur replied.


	5. Pizza night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arthur and Harley, pizza and movies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's really fun to write Arthur outside his own timeline/world. He's such a sweet man and reimagining him in a less painful reality is just wonderful. I just love how it's great to imagine Joaquin and Margot interacting. They could have an intense chemestry that would work greatly on the screen. I hope they make a movie together or something.

They managed to find a weekend where Harleen could give up her activities and Arthur did not have a shift as street clown so both could watch movies and talk. Harley let Arthur choose the movies and he brought a DVD player and two old Chaplin movies.

Harleen had what most people would classify as a weird taste for movies. She was more a 90s teenage romance kind of girl, sometimes. Other moments, she would love weird, horror and slash movies like _Love Witch_. But a she didn’t know Arthur’s taste for weirdness, she allowed him to bring his selected movies.

They had a nice time, even though she noticed that Arthie seemed to be somehow tense around Bruce (who was not chained this time), but after the first minutes, he seemed to relax a little. Harley was surprised how much she did enjoy the movie. It was a kind of sweet and childish humor and this Chaplin guy was a real talent.

But she had to admit that sometimes she stopped watching the movies to look at him. Harley discovered that she really like Arthur’s features. He had a gracious long nose, a proportional masculine face and a nice jaw, all of this crowned with these green-blue eyes that were very expressive and emotional and that she loved to stare to. She had to take small breaks from doing that because she was not exactly a discrete person and she did not want Arthur to think she made the movie just an excuse to see him. She actually wanted to spend time with him. Quality time, she meant, not the “I’m-too-drunk-to-stand-on-my-own” time.

“Did you like it?” Arthie asked when the movie was over.

“Yeah, it was actually much more fun than I thought. I’ve never been fond of old people’s movie.”.

He laughed. The laughing then grew uncontrolled and Harley froze a bit because that laughing resembled Mister J's. But she was a psychiatrist and had enough knowledge and training to not react scared in front of him. She just put a hand on his shoulder and asked if everything was all right.

After several minutes, he stopped.

“Sorry, it’s a condition. Due to a brain injury. It’s called Pseudobulbar Affect.”

“It’s okay” she said “I used to work with this kind of thing.”

“So, don’t you think I’m a creepy or a weirdo?” he asked.

Then, she laughed.

“Have you ever looked at my face, this apartment or being aware that there is a fucking hyena lying next to our feet? Dude, I’m a fucking weirdo myself.” She said, smiling. “I mean that’s something on your fucking brain right? You can’t control it. It’s just your brain doing its stuff.”

Arthur smiled. It was a smile that almost broke her heart. It was sweet and painful at the same time, like he probably never heard someone telling him there was no problem if he had an injury that caused effects on him that he could not control. Harley smiled back and they stood starring at each other like nothing else in the world mattered. She felt it would be a great moment for a kiss, but then she noticed how afraid it was if that happen and she just blew their whole connection and friendship away because she could not keep her clitoris inside her panties, so she decided to break the moment.

“So, how did you come to like Chaplin?” she asked, finding out any probable matter to discuss.

“My mother used to watch it. She told me I was born to bring happiness to the world, my nickname was Happy. Then she showed me the Chaplin’s movie. Since I started to work as street artist he has been my inspiration”

“Hey, that’s very nice. I don’t remember any good thing I’ve inherited from my mom. Because I did not know her. She left when I was 5 or 6, I barely remember her. My father tried to change me for beer. But I always found my way back home” she said, her voice sounding a little more sad than she expected “Then he gave me up to the nuns.”

“I don’t think you’ve inherited anything from the nuns” he said, and she giggled.

“Oh, no, I just scared them to death. I think they were relieved when I got my scholarship and went to the Med School.”

“College was escape, then?” he asked.

“Yeah, what a coward right?” she giggled, sadly.

“Oh, it’s okay. Art is my escape. Everything is fine if you just could pretend not to be yourself sometimes.”

“Hell yeah, Arthie. You’re goddamn right.”

They chatted for a long time, eating the rest of the pizza that Harley had bought. The conversation actually made them lost track of time. None of them noticed, but Arthur fell asleep on the couch. Harleen rested the head on his shoulder and swept away into her dreams.


	6. Coffee, milk and cereal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Normalcy

Arthur woke up with Harleen’s head on his shoulder. He slowly moved his head, trying not to move the rest of his body at all. He appreciated the view of her sleeping. Harleen did not sleep like a movie lady, she seemed to be snoring low and some saliva came out of her lips, getting into his clothes. But she also looked very calm and satisfied there, with him. He thought she was the most genuine human being he had ever spent time with. His mother, his working fellows, they all seemed to be a shallow simulacra, living to fulfill their basic needs and being castrated to survive. Harley seemed to be somewhere else. He felt she had crossed the line between sanity and insanity, going back and forwards often, and probably that’s why he felt so comfortable with her, even with that _fucking hyena_ sleeping near them. 

And there was more about her, he took a brief look to the pictures near them, on the walls and table. There was a single picture of a serious little Harleen with some austere nuns, but there were some from college. He liked the ones she was doing her aerial gymnastics poses, glowing and happy on a bright red and black colan ( _She looks like a female jester,_ Arthur thought).

His stomach moaned. Even if he was still scared of Bruce, he carefully shifted the weight of Harley’s body so she could fully lie on the couch. He took some steps towards the kitchen, when he felt safe that Bruce wouldn’t attack, Arthur started to make coffee. He thought it was funny how difficult it was to find the coffee, but how easy it was to find any child-related junk food. He made coffee and also put some cereal with milk for both of them.

He rejoiced in the feeling of normalcy. That felt so right.

A part of him, though, suspected that things weren’t normal with Harley. Soon enough he’d find he was right. 


	7. Harley Quinn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arthur finds out who Harleen really is

Harleen arrived at her home late that night, she was currently “freelancing” to some local gangsters and she had accepted a work with Oswald “the Penguin” Cobblepot, helping him to steal some weapons that had just arrived on Gotham’s docks. He needed someone flexible and agile to help his goons to get into the ships, and she was that person. She liked working for Cobblepot because he paid in cash and he paid _a lot_ , she had earned enough to pay the rent for some months and it would also be still cash for he food and daily stuff.

Harley was whistling happily when she turned the lights and saw the Black Mask sitting on her couch.

“Well, well, well. What a happy Quinzel we’ve here.” Sionis said, taking off the mask. “It almost seems like you were in a successful criminal transaction tonight”.

Harley swallowed hard.

“Hey Romy, long time no see!”

“Cut the fucking shit, Quinn” he said, throwing something at her feet. It was a big green wig. “Your new boyfriend has been robbed by some burglars today. Luckily, nothing happened to him, besides being punched in the face and having some items stolen, also losing some coins.” He said, smiling.

“Sionis, just let Arthur out of it. He has nothing to do with what I do.”

“Well, Szaz has told me otherwise. Some people are seeing you two around, so happy together, looking like a stupid little couple.”

“Do you think mister J would allow it?” She asked, bluffing.

“Nobody sees you around with the Joker anymore, Quinn.”

“Well, these spies you have are shit then, right?”

“Having a picture of him full of knives on your wall mean something?” Sionis asked, pointing to his back.

“Yeah, we’re into bondage.”

“Quinzel, you’re too smart ass for your own sake. I’ll cut the shit. Stop getting involved with Cobblepot. You know he’s my adversary and what you helped him accomplish tonight will affect my business. Next time, it’s your little boyfriend who will pay the price okay.”

Harley shivered.

“Keep Arthur out of this business, Romy, I ain’t getting into your way anymore.”

He stood up and approached her, caressing her face.

“Good girl. I am patient, you know. I could’ve kidnapped and tortured him right away to teach you a lesson. But I want to trust you to be a good girl from now on”, he told her.

“I’ll be a good girl”

“For your own fucking sake. And his”, Sionis answered.

Next day, she woke up early to see Arthur.

She knocked the door and he opened it, kind of still half asleep. She saw the bruise around his eye and her heart shrunk.

She couldn’t help herself but hugging him as hard as she could.

“Hey, Arthie, I’m sorry. Doc told me what happened.”

Arthur invited her inside, it was early, he was making coffee and getting ready to go to the streets. Harley helped him to put some medicine and to finish his clown make up after breakfast. He seemed kind of tense and a strange silence was amongst them.

“They told me to stay away from you.” He finally said.

“What?”, she asked

“The guys who attacked me, they told me that Harley Quinn was trouble” Arthur told her. “You never told me your last name, so I suppose this Harley Quinn is you, Harleen. Is that who you are? Harley Quinn? The criminal?”

Harley swallowed.

“Arthie, I can explain everything.”

“You don’t need to explain anything. You’ve hidden who you’re from me. I was at risk and I didn’t know.” He told her “You _should’ve_ told me. I could choose. I wouldn’t judge you, I wouldn’t be afraid of you. You’re the most genuine person I’ve ever spent time with.”

The last sentence made a silent tear run down her face.

“I’ll ask you to leave, Harleen. Or Harley Quinn, if you prefer. I’ve had my amount of hiding and lying for this lifetime. Please, go.”

Harley got up and left his apartment, other tears coming down her face. She did not see Arthur crying too when she closed the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think there's a bit of a plot being born right here. Next chapter will be happier (?).


	8. Hysterical for love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley helps Arthur, and that'll take her back to her past and to old 'friends'.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone is safe and healthy! Sorry for the delay. The apocalypse has got me without inspiration. This chapter is shorter than I expected, but next one will be longer and Arthur and Harley will delve into some deep issues.

I've got a violence in my dreams

I've got a makeup on my teeth

We're all hysterical for love

A love to lean on

Psycho Lovers – Local Natives

She missed him so much. He had been avoiding her since the day he told her to leave him alone. She felt miserable for having lying to him. But yet, she wanted to explain things to him, how she felt scared he would leave her if she told him everything about who she was. He seemed to be so unaware of her, of all the freaks and criminals of Gotham. Arthur had some kind of innocence and pureness that Harley did not want to disrupt. It made him vulnerable, and that’s where Sionis took his move.

She stalked him for a few days. It was hard to find a common clothe on her wardrobe, but she found something of her “Dr. Quinzel” days and she wore it to follow him, by distance, through the streets. She loved seeing him dancing and performing, she loved how kind he was to kids, how caring he was to everyone who paid attention to him. She adored everything about the very pure way he treated the world, even when it had fucked him up most of his life.

Arthur missed Harley too.

He missed her laughter and her happiness, he missed the crazy energy she bought into his life and he missed spending nights talking and watching movies with her. Damn, he missed Bruce, even if that hyena still scared the shit out of him, mostly.

But he couldn’t just go and talk to her knowing that it exposed him to dangerous and that she knew it and she couldn’t tell him the truth.

Doc even asked if there was something wrong with them and Arthur just dismissed him talking that Harley was just too busy these days.

The old man pretended to believe him.

Harley felt that something was wrong.

She just felt it. She could not exactly tell how. Instinct, maybe.

She came out on the small hallway that separated her apartment from Arthur’s. She had the hysterical laughter that still made her shiver a little. She knew Arthur was out of control because of the intensity of it.

_Fuck it_ , she thought, knocking on the door and calling him.

“Hey, Arthie, is it all okay?”

No answer, just the intense laughter echoing so loudly that she was scared of thinking about Arthur’s condition in the moment. She forced the door and opened it, since it was old, it was not difficult.

Arthur was laying on the floor, laughing himself uncontrollably, his face all burning red and his breath out of rhythm.

“Arthur!!” she called out, kneeling by his side. She patted his head and started to try to tell him to breathe, to calm down, he lifted his head and put it on her lap. He stood there, several minutes. She kept stroking his hair, telling him everything was okay.

After several minutes, he stopped.

“Harley.” He said, recognizing her. Her name sounded like his most dear prayer.

He told her that he had run out of medicines. The place he used to get it was closed by Gotham’s mayor, for what he knew, due to attacks of rival gangs. Maybe it was Cobblepot and Sioni’s, he wasn’t sure.

“I need the meds, Harley.”

“I know, Arthur, why didn’t you ask to me?”

“I didn’t want to talk to you”, he was so honest that it made her speechless for a moment.

“I’ll get ya. I can get tons of those for free.” she told him, she thought about going to a place she had been avoiding her entire life, but she'd go there for Arthur “I’ve got a friend. His name is Jonathan Crane. He owes me. I’ll get your meds.”


	9. Teardrop

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley finds Crane. Arthur and Harley talk about their pasts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I think this chapter is more like Phillips' Joker or Nolan's Batman than Yang's BoP. The tone of the fic was more likely to follow the latter movie, because it inspired this work, but I think it was very refreshing to have a change of pace. I'd like comments from the readers about what your thoughts on it and be honest, please.  
> And also, I created a playlist which I was listening while writing this chapter, so if you want to listen to it, I'll let the link at the beggining of the chapter.  
> And yes, Cillian Murphy is my Jonathan Crane.

[(Suggested Playlist)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umJTV5ZwV3Q&list=PLIINOEzh-j-4c5DQPmdDAlzL-Iye1kzPb&index=1)

_Love, love is a verb_   
_Love is a doing word_   
_Fearless on my breath_   
_Gentle impulsion_   
_Shakes me, makes me lighter_   
_Fearless on my breath_   
_Teardrop on the fire_   
_Fearless on my breath_

Teardrop - Massive Attack

It was very strange for her to come back to that place that once had been a central part of her life and also the vortex of her doom. She starred out to Gotham, that dubious city, which was very greyish and ugly today because of the persistent rain that stood with them for days. Harley was seated on Crane’s comfortable swivel chair, spinning slowly, facing that impressive room that contrasted with the rest of the building. It was not a huge space, she’d say it was medium sized, but it was very beautiful. The colors were the burgundy and the black, alternating itself on an almost royal like pattern. The furniture was made of expensive wood, maybe even illegal, with a sophisticated and comfortable design. There was even a small minibar. She thought how it felt like an oasis in a desert of despair that was Arkham outside there. The whole place was white and gray, fulfilled with despair of the imprisoned and neglected and precarious conditions for employees. Yet, Crane lived the glory and the pleasure of a king inside these walls.

He was her advisor once, almost like a demi god to her. It was Crane’s idea – causing the rage of her more experienced colleagues – delivering the clown prince to her. Of course, at the time she was so happy that she even made sex with him as a way to show her gratitude. Now, years later, when she was almost another person, she could see that if things had gone in other path, if she had succeeded on treating mister J, it would be Crane who would have get the praising. At the time, he was involved in a public inquiry from the federal government to investigate his methods of treating patients with his toxin (later called “Fear Gas”). Later, after Quinzel had become Quinn, Crane got involved in a huge scandal and Gotham’s tabloids had called his creation “Fear Gas”. He almost got out of Arkham, but he had a lot of influence with local authorities – by knowing how corrupt they were –, and it made him stay. Since then, he kept his experiences with patients, but now everything was confidential enough to not get him in trouble.

“Miss Quinzel”, his soft voice had cut her thoughts, remembering a part of her life that almost felt like it was someone else’s.

“Hey, doc” she said. “Long time no see, huh?”

“Tell me how did you get in here and tell me why shouldn’t I call the guards to put you in a fucking jail that’s where you belong.”, he said, approaching the table carefully, looking at the big stick she had on her lap, his intense and shiny blue eyes burning bright in a dangerous way.

“I need something from you, pills.” She said “And your guards are sedated. The reason why you’re not going to put in any jail is because it wouldn’t be nice to get mr. J here to save me. Again. Also, I’m also getting some work done with the Penguin, who’s one of the main buyers of your little gas, and mister J could tell him to stop buying it.” God, she was _good_ at bluffing.

“Why do you want the pills?”

She hesitated for a moment, but not enough to give Jonathan the time to read her lies.

“It’s for an experiment”

He raised an ironic eyebrow.

“So, it feels like the fruit never falls too far from the tree, right, Quinzel?”

She ignored him, giving him a paper with the pills she needed for Arthur.

“That’s not too much. I’ll give what you want.”

He went to a fancy wood cabinet, got the whole bunch of pills and delivered it to her, placing them in the table in front of them. She took it. She stood up, eyes always glued to Crane, moving carefully, like cornered prey, toward the door.

“Don’t even think about calling someone, Crane, I know every hole of this damned place. I’ll get out here safe, untouched, and we call it a day.”

“Today, you’ll get here safe. The next time I get my hands on you, fuck your dear boyfriend, you’ll be caged with the others for the rest of your life, Quinzel”, he said, his blue eyes burning intensely.

She opened the door and ignored him, but she shivered a bit, she knew what Jonathan Crane was capable of when he felt threatened.

He was a predator, a beast. Beasts rarely took intimidation peacefully.

She got back to their old building easily. She knew enough of Arkham staff to get out there safely. Her bluffing worked out on Crane. She was happy that nobody knew about her break up and that her immunity was still valid on most places. Yet, she couldn’t hold a small fear. Crane was dangerous. And Sionis was already on her back. She pushed away the thoughts.

She dried the raindrops that wet her, changed her clothes, putting on pink leggings - which warmed her up, as the temperature was falling with the rain - and a black cropped shirt with a smiling jester on it.

She took the pills and after that, crossed the small hallway and knocked at Arthur’s door.

He opened it, he was wearing a simple brown shirt and his typical old dark blue jeans, and he welcomed her with a still awkward smile, signaling with a hand gesture for her to enter.

“Hey Harley”

“Hey, Arthie. I got your pills” She said, extending her hand with a brown paper bag where she had put what Jonathan had given her. 

His expressive and intense face seemed to be filled with various emotions; his eyes seemed to have some relief, at the same time that he did not accept immediately, probably because he was still suspicious of Harley after what happened.

“Arthie, just take it. I mean, you need it for real”

He took the paper bag from her hand and placed it above the small table in front of the couch.

“Do you want to know who I am for real” she asked “I can tell you, everything”

He took a cigarette out of his pocket and lit it, looking at her in silence.

“How does a brilliant young researcher become a crazy criminal, I can tell you that”

He gestured to her to sit on the couch, which she interpreted as a positive sign, as the sign that he wanted to listen to her tale.

“Become a psychiatrist. Work in an asylum. Fall in love with your patient. Break said patient out of said asylum. Begin a life of crime. Jump into a vat of chemicals to prove yourself to a madman. Get arrested by the Batman. Go back to jail. Get out of jail with a bomb on your neck. Save the world, go back to jail, and break out of jail before breaking up with the aforementioned madman, and going out on your own.” She said, trying to summarize her insane adult life to him on the most objective way.

“But what about before that?”

“What do you mean”

“Harley, you told me what happened, but you didn’t tell me who you are. Where did you come from, what you feel. I want to know this stuff.”

She starred at him. She felt a bit uncomfortable by someone asking her so many complex questions. Usually, on her professional life, that was _her_ role. Her hands adjusted her small ponytails in an involuntary act that materialized her discomfort. She took a deep breath, listening to the rain outside, trying to put her thoughts in order so she could answer him.

“I was a little child abandoned by her parents” she answered him, her voice shaking subtly. “A child that was raised by some cold ass nuns, becoming a rebel teenager. This teenager was particularly smart and also loved doing gymnastics and aerial sports. That’s how I got the scholarship to get into med school. After that, I became fascinated with human mind, and studying it became my most intense passion. That’s how I got to Crane and into Arkham, and later on, that’s how I got to the Joker.”

She paused, facing him shortly, he seemed to be absorbed onto her and her words. His intensity kind of scared her a little. His blue-green eyes scanned her face, like they could get more from her beyond the words.

“How I felt?” she said “I felt like until I broke up with mister J, my life belonged to someone else’s. To my parents. To the nuns. To Crane. To the Joker. I mean, nobody gives a fuck about harlequins, we live to serve. To be a harlequin without a master, now, that was the joke. The joke was on me. And that’s why I didn’t tell you who I was. I thought you even know it, but I wasn’t sure. Deep down I was afraid you would abandon me like everyone else. I know it was a terrible decision and I’m not proud of it, I just didn’t want to be a freak, a loner again.”

She finished her sentence and she looked at him. He seemed truly touched by her words. His eyes seemed to want to absorb her.

“Harley, I’ve been a loner and a freak my whole life. Even my mother who was supposed to love me, she abandoned me to abusers and she never really cared about me. I was a burden which later became a convenient person to have around when she grew ill and sick. And I took care of her until the day she died. Then, for the first time, I was a loner and a freak, but I was free.”

It was her turn to stare at him. Every sentence came out of him accompanied by an intense flow of emotions on his eyes. Sadness was the one who took over the most.

“You know, Harley, until I met you I haven’t been happy one minute on _my entire fucking life_.” 

She was struck with surprise.

“The worst part about my mother didn’t come until she was dead.” He told her “I’ve been one of Arkham’s patients. Because when I was a child, my mother had the most fucked up boyfriends who used to spank both of us and who used to beat my head against the wall. That’s how I got the condition” he said, referring to his uncontrollable burst of laughing. “And after she died, I was digging out her stuff and I found out some notes from her to a guy called Thomas Wayne. Yes, the deadly rich billionaire. And I found out some documents from Arkham. I got there and I stole it” he paused, taking a moment to smoke the cigarette in his hand. His face was momentarily filled with smoke, misty as if enveloped by the past. “Summing it up: Penny adopted me, but she herself was a narcissist who could barely manage her own life. I’ve been burdened with her for thirty years, thinking that everything was my fault. That I was the problem. But it wasn’t. She was the problem. That’s why I came here, to start a life that I felt was truly mine”

He finished his words and kept smoking. A heavy silence fell between them.

Harley wanted to tell him many things, but she couldn’t. She felt so much pain in her heart. Arthur was the kindest and most worthy man she had ever met. He was gentle and he took care of people, he genuinely wanted to bring good things to the world, even if he hadn’t received any of it during his life.

Following her impulses, she hugged him. He seemed surprised and even tense, probably due to the lack of physical and affection contact during all his life. He threw the rest of his still burning cigarette on the floor and answered her hug, involving her waist with his thin, yet toned, arms. They stood there for long minutes, feeling each other’s scent. Hers was sweet from the perfume she used, his was a mixture of mild cheap soap, cigarette and coffee. She closed her eyes and she thought she was going to drown into his smell and the sound of the rain, feeling lots of unexplained emotions that clashed on her conscious mind like violent waves.

“You’re the minute of happiness that I’ve always wanted in my life, Harley”, he told her, and she felt a teardrop on her shoulder. He let her go. But she gently caressed his wavy dark brown hair. Her arm involved him and he leaned his head on her shoulder, while his hands involved hers.

There they stood, listening to the rain that ravished Gotham City.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think that next chapter we may have some mild smut, because I think that their relationship is now developed enough so Arthur can trust Harley to touch him in ways he had not let no one touch.  
> Please, don't forget of commenting on this chapter. I usually don't ask for comments, but I want to know if this chapter works with the rest of the fic, since I think that was a big change of pace here.


	10. Busting at the seams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kisses and more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, there was not a great deal of new comments, but I love this ship and this story, and I'll persist even without the readers' feedback. This was inspired by Fiona Apple's new album, specially the track Heavy Balloon.

_I spread like strawberries (I spread like strawberries)_

_I climb like peas and beans (I climb like peas and beans)_

_I've been sucking it in so long_

_That I'm busting at the seams_

Heavy Balloon – Fiona Apple

Harley stopped hating the rainy days in Gotham. According to the weather forecast, the rain would not stop for the following weeks, so it was better to adapt. Besides how much it bothered her to go out to do her “business stuff” (aka freelancing for gangsters) in the rain and getting home soaked and cold, there were some advantages on these cold rainy days.

Arthur and she had tuned back to their old friendship after their conversation and it was really nice to spend afternoons and some nights together. Sometimes, she went to his apartment and they drank coffee and talked for hours about random stuff. Arthur loved to listen to her telling him her old adventures and her crimes back on her Bonnie and Clyde days with Mister J. Sometimes, when she was narrating her past actions on her harleyquinesque manners, she noticed his eyes glowing like a child listening to a really adventurous story. She also loved to listen to him talking about comedy and his work and how he studied Chapplin manners. She’d like him to talk more about his past, but he avoided the topic and she respected it.

He also went to her place and they generally spent some time watching movies or series. Once, Arthur even petted Bruce, even if he was still a bit scared of the hyena. She loved how these moments with were incredibly sweet. He was the first man on her life that appreciated her and treated her respectfully. Even when they were watching movies together, the way he hugged her shoulders was very delicate. Sometimes, he caressed her hair and it seemed that he was touching something too precious for him, that could break if he did not appreciate it properly.

But touching was an issue for him. Harley knew she desired him, she wanted to touch him and also be touched back. But every time she tried to let things go further, Arthur seemed to be sucked into a vortex of anxiety and fear. Once, he even had an uncontrollable burst of laughter that made her feel guilty. She understood that it was a result of his traumatic childhood, she wanted to talk with him about that, but she did not want to show her frustration of feeling rejected. So, she just left the subject aside and decided to enjoy their friendship the way it was.

It was another cold rainy night at Gotham city, the rain was intense and the thunders were loud and heavy outside, scaring even Bruce a little. Harley and Arthur were watching movies together – it was the 90s Teen Movie Night, as Harley baptized it – when the lights went out and darkness took over them on her apartment. At first, there was nothing but the sound of the rain and the urban chaos outside. For several minutes, she enjoyed the blissful peace that darkness bought her, but she was worried when Arthur’s hands touched her and she sensed urgency.

“Hey, Arthie, is everything okay?”, they were on the couch, Harley was leaning with the head on his shoulder, his arms involving her shoulders.

“Yes”, he said, with his low voice. But his fingers were persistent on exploring her body. He went curiously through her forearms, cautiously touching her slim, yet gymnastic-tonified, biceps. “You’re beautiful, Harley”, he told her with husky voice.

Suddenly, she understood. Arthur also wanted to touch her. He probably felt better on the dark because he could not see her and then he wouldn’t worry about her judgments or feeling ugly or a failure for her. He could ignore his own insecurities outside of the light.

“You’re beautiful too, Arthie. I love your eyes, and your hair” then she laughed “God, I love your body” she giggled, and he interrupted her by delicately turning her head to him. She could sense his eyes burning with desire even in the dark. She couldn’t hold herself and placed a very subtle kiss on his lips. She quickly evaded, afraid that it would scare him like it did before.

But he kissed her back. He tried to interrupt her to explain how unexperienced he was when it came to women. But Harley did not let him talk. She hold his head with her hands, kissing him several times. First, these were slow and delicate meeting of lips. Then, she adventured on exploring his mouth with her tongue. The kissing lasted several minutes and she felt him shaking, his body trembling with delight. She started touching his body so she could reassure him of her desire.

Her hands explored down on his body and she found his erection hiding under his clothes.

He stopped when he sensed her hands.

“Arthur, I want you.” She said, her other hand caressing his hair “All of you.”

He kissed her, this time.

Harley discovered that Arthur wanted her too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter we'll have the Crane-Sionis bond against Harley and maybe mister J is finally coming around. Maybe also a more detailed smut.


	11. Strange Little Birds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The full version of Arthur and Harley's night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry it took me so long to write this. But I hope the wait will be worth. I managed to write a decent full smut for the first time. It's not as detailed and not yet so good, but I think it's the better I've written so far. And I strongly advise you to listen to Garbage's albums Garbage (1995) or Strange Little Birds (2016), while reading to this.

_I am weak_

_But I am strong_

_I can use my tears to_

_Bring you home_

Milk – Garbage

Harley woke up, the rain was still heavy outside. The electrical light had come back and she was satisfied because she could use the coffee machine to make a bit of this strong liquid that Arthur loved so much. Before doing that, she looked at him, his thin yet strong form lying naked next to her. She thought about the night before and it made a devious, sassy smile cross her face. It was not the best sex of her life, but Arthur had a great potential. He might not be the most skilled lover, but he was very caring and loving and Harley loved it on him. The memories of their night came running all over her mind.

(Past Night)

“Arthur, I want you”, she told him.

He kissed her back, this time so intensely that he almost fell over her on the couch.

She laughed when they broke apart, surprised by his response.

“Hey, I don’t want to fuck on the couch, c’mon.” she said, giggling. She got up on her feet and took his hand, leading him to the bed.

He sat on the edge of the bed. Now, he looked a bit tense, she could devise nervousness on his blue-green eyes. She sat beside him and kissed his cheek, lovingly. She intertwined their fingers, caressing his hands.

“Harley, I’m not good at this. I want you. But I’ve made sex just once in my life. It was with a prostitute. I felt terrible afterwards.”

“Arthur, it’s okay. I don’t expect you to know the whole _Kama Sutra_ by heart” she said, sassily “I just want us to enjoy each other’s body and that’s it. Let’s see how it rolls”.

After saying this, Harley just took off her t-shirt. She was wearing no bra, her pale breasts almost glowing on the dark. She decided to light a candle, so that Arthur could see her better. She got up, going to the small kitchen. Harley found a candle in a cupboard and lit it. She fixed the candle with the wax inside a mug and placed it on the nightstand beside the bed. Then, she sat again beside him.

“Look, Arthie.” She said, touching his face and turning it to her breasts.

He stood several minutes just looking at her breasts.

“Can I touch?”, he asked, shyly.

Instead of answering, Harley placed his hand on her left breast. She had not big boobs. Hers were small, but round and firm. Arthur caressed her nipple. His other hand soon started playing with the other breast. She smiled, noticing how concentrated he was. He seemed like a lab researcher absorbed on a new discovery. He spent some minutes touching her nipples with the point of his fingers, trying each at time. Then, Arthur tried to squeeze her breasts slowly with both hands. It was a kind of squeeze so soft that it felt like a massage and Harley moaned, involuntarily. He smiled, noticing her pleasure. He tried squeezing more strongly. His index and middle fingers of each hand squeezed her nipples at the same time. She moaned quietly again, almost suffocating it on her throat.

“Lie down”, he said, with a husky voice.

She did, lying on the mattress, her back supported by the pillows. He laid over her, his attention focused on her nipples. He started to suck them, each one at time. Harley could feel herself already wet. He started to lick them roundly. It was a very pleasant view, Arthur over her, playing with her nipples. She caressed his hair gently. He stood there, playing with her breasts for a long while.

“I want you to take your clothes off, Arthie”, she said, when she suddenly noticed that he was still fully dressed.

He stopped playing with her nipples and looked at her, his face beautifully illuminated by the light of the candle.

“I’m ashamed of my body. I don’t want you to think I’m ugly”

She smiled.

“I don’t think.”

He hesitated for a moment. But then he stopped, got up and started to undress. Harley undressed the pants that was still on her body, lying down again with only her pink and black panties. She looked at Arthur, who was now huddled in the corner of the bed, wearing only his brown underwear. She reached out, embracing him. She slowly bought his body over hers, both lying down on the bed, embracing him with her legs and arms. She could feel his erection.

“Rock your hips” she said, whispering on his ear. She noticed how sexy the whole atmosphere was, with the light of the candle and the rain outside.

He started rocking against her slowly, his erection still covered, rubbing against her wet entrance, which was also covered. He started to moan and she joined his moaning, her hands caressing his back up and down.

“I’m gonna come” He said.

“Not yet”, she whispered back “Stop”.

He followed her command. She pulled away from him, stood up and took off her panties.

“I want to make something that will feel very good, Arthie” she whispered on his ear, positioning herself on his lap, wiggling her hips. He closed his eyes. She placed one of his hands on her butt, and she was pleasantly surprised when he smacked it, strongly. “Can I?”

He agreed with a positive motion of his head.

She went down on him and started to play with his erection. Mister J was fond of oral sex and Harley got skilled on it. She started to caress it with her hand and suck it at the same time. Arthur moaned loudly. Whe **n th** e moan got more intense, she went for his balls, licking and sucking them carefully.

She went back up on positioning herself on his lap.

“You can do the same to me” she told him, then explaining how women liked to be kissed down there too. He went there, following Harley’s advice. He started by licking her clit slowly. Then he started exploring more and also introduced a finger inside Harley. She was surprised how he got to a steady and satisfactory rhythm for someone who was so inexperienced.

When Harley was over the edge, she told him to stop.

He came over her and kissed her, so she could taste her own juices on his mouth.

“I don’t have a condom” he told her.

“I’m on pill”, she reassured him. 

He smiled.

“Come on in, Arthie, I want to feel all of you.”

He smiled. Arthur took a brief moment to undress his underpants and got back to her. He laid over her again and entered her smoothly.

As the rain outside grew heavier, his hips also found a more intense rhythm.

After a few long, intense minutes, a thunder violently stroke Gotham, while Arthur and Harley came together.

“Hey, pretty boy, coffee time” Harley said.

Arthur smiled, opening his eyes and seeing her naked with a mug of coffee and a plate with a sandwich on her hands.

“That was the best night of my life, and I think this is the best morning.”

She giggled.

“I hope we can have more nights like that” she said, smiling “Often.”

She sat back on the bed, kissing him smoothly, while he took the mug and the plate on his own hands.

While they were enjoying their morning coffee, Sionis and Crane were together on Sionis’ place on the fancy side of Gotham, planning on how to destroy Harleen Quinzel.


End file.
